Here we are a month and a half into the New Year, right around the time that all those resolutions start to be forgotten. I made some pretty big resolutions this year. I feel like I've been putting myself on the sidelines of life, waiting for "a better time" to do things. Since having my youngest in 2012 I've been struggling really hard with my weight. It's to be expected after two kids and an uncontrolled Thyroid. That same Thyroid also makes it really hard to lose weight even when it is controlled. I've been putting off going back to school for about a decade, not too long or anything. So, this year, I took on some ambitious goals this year.
I plan to eat better and lose weight, drink more water, cut sugar, go back to school, commit, be a better mother/wife/friend, take on a home improvement project regularly, etc. I started the year off really well with the healthy eating. Vegetables and tofu fill my fridge while lentils and beans fill the pantry. With all the things I've decided to DO, I thought about all the things I shouldn't do. I'm in the middle of a resolution slump. I ate from two different pizza places in a matter of 24 hours, pretty sure that's not good, well it tasted good, but not good for me... or my kids for that matter. Good thing I'm not up for Mom of the Year anyway. I thought maybe sharing all the things I need to stop doing would kick me back into gear.
In no certain order, here's my list of things to stop doing:
1. Making faces at myself in the mirror. I have terrible vision and any time I try to look at my hair, I squint to push my glasses a little higher and to look through my lens and at the top of my head... complicated, yes? Effective? Sure, but the squinting isn't REALLY necessary. A lot of the times I'm looking and then get disappointed and the squinting and frowning continue. I have been caught many times doing this in the bathroom mirror at work and I finally decided, I need to stop. I squint enough, I guarantee that I'll have a permanent creases between my brows in 10 years, I don't need to make it worse. I make faces at myself even when I can see myself. Sometimes I make faces looking at my outfit or my shape. I don't need to be disappointed in how I look, I don't need to make a face at myself, and above all- I don't need my kids to SEE me making faces at myself. Having good body image is just as important for boys as it is girls. They need to see themselves in a positive way and they need to see me in a positive way. If they think I don't like how I look then they'll get the idea that they shouldn't either and that could translate to the girls they encounter in life. I don't need to be the reason my boys have a distorted idea of how a woman should look.
2. Finishing all the food on my plate when I'm already full. I blame my parents for telling me to clear my plate as a kids, they meant well, but that's a terribly hard habit to break. I think many parents do it. They either are concerned their kids are trying to rush away from the plate to go play and will be hungry in 10 minutes or they are worried their kids conveniently didn't eat those carrots and are now "full", but will be hungry again in 10 minutes. Whenever I run into this with my kids, I let them know that they can get up if they are done, but that this was their dinner and there will be no snacks or treats later. So, if they are still hungry, they need to eat a little more. There's no reason to clear your plate, no matter your age, unless you are ACTUALLY hungry. I have this habit of having a lot or even a little left on my plate and I feel the need to finish it. I think "It's just two bites, I can eat that." When I should really say "It's only two bites. I can throw that away or add it to the leftovers for later."
3. Procrastinating. I call myself a Master Procrastinator, a real professional. I can put things off until the last minute. Projects and papers when I was in school, cleaning, going to bed, waking up. Not really sure why I procrastinate, but I have ALWAYS done it. I can remember even in junior high being up all night to work on papers and projects. I used to say that I did my best work at the last minute. I think at this point in my life, I should be able to do things before the last minute. If I have two weeks to get something done, I should be able to work on it a little at a time leading up to the end and not rushing to get it done the night before. This is important especially since these deadlines are for myself. I don't really have projects to do at work, all my deadlines are personal. Why would I want to make my personal life more difficult?
4. Being tired. Some of this is because I don't get enough sleep, some is that lovely Thyroid-I'm perpetually tired, but some of it is just pure laziness. If I got up and was more productive, I probably wouldn't be so tired. Or I would still be tired, but I'd at least have a good reason for it.
5. Spending my weekends inside. I'm gone 11 hours a day, five days a week. I get about 4-5 hours of sleep a night. I'm tired and/or per the above, just lazy. I want to spend time with my kids, in my pajamas, hanging out. Sometimes though, I think I spend too much time at home with them on the weekend. I always want to do stuff, but I make up excuses. Some of them are valid like, most things cost money and there's not a whole lot of that going around these days, so I need things to be free and that's often a rare find. My husband is a huge hermit and doesn't like to leave the house which means I have to do things with both kids by myself and that sucks. It's hard, but not unheard of or impossible. Note: I have a free pass to stay inside from the beginning of December to the beginning of March... into mid March depending on the weather. Maybe the beginning of April....
6. Spending my "me time" poorly. I am lucky that I actually get "me time" since so many moms don't or don't get much. I tend to waste it, but not on purpose. I get lost on Facebook, Pinterest, or Instagram and then all of sudden, my time is up! I'd much rather use my time to craft or clean... that's right, clean. I clean and craft better when I'm alone. It's weird, but true. I'm tired of wasting time.
7. Making excuses to not exercise. Do I really need to elaborate?
8. Spending so much time on social media or in front of an electronic device. It's not just my "me time" that's sucked up by social media. I'd say, it's like, any time I'm not sleeping, showering, or working, mostly because I can't get a signal at the office... I mean.... because I would NEVER do that.... Right now I'm at the end of an accidental four day weekend. I was off yesterday for President's Day and today due to a snow storm. At various points in the weekend I looked around and thought "I need to unplug". I've been thinking about it a lot lately. I spend nine hours a day in front of a computer at work, often taking breaks to fight off headaches and blurred vision. I use my GPS app in the car every day to and from work (great for avoiding delays in Northern Virginia traffic), I use my phone to Pin recipes for dinner and general pinning fun, for Facebook to connect with family and friends and to check in on the group I help moderate, and then there's Instagram and Buzzfeed videos (cannot get enough of them). We usually don't watch a lot of t.v., but this weekend really made up for that. At one point, my oldest was playing a Lego game on the Xbox, my youngest was watching cartoons on t.v., and I was on my phone and laptop. I'm heading towards an electronics overload. I guess some of that is to be expected on a snow day, but we need a break. I think if I put the phone down a little more, we'd all get along better. My husband swears I never listen, especially when I'm on my phone. He might be right (don't tell him though). I just don't think I'm being the best me with my face in my phone. Definitely relates to my resolutions to commit and be a better mom and wife.
So, if you've hit a resolution slump, instead of thinking of all the things you need to be doing, think about what you shouldn't be doing. It just might help kick you back into gear.
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